The Mind's Why
Why you should ask for help if you need it and why I did.
Life is not simple or as straight forward as we think, it can be super overwhelming.
Let me explain with an example...
These past few months for me have been beyond hard and I've had to make many difficult decisions or choices, as much as I do not like to admit it, I've had to rely on a lot of help. I don't like asking for help, not because I am too proud, I think its because I am too stubborn. I am determined to do a lot for myself and not rely on others, but in my situation...I've had no choice. I'm now 4 and a half months pregnant, In my first trimester I suffered from Hypermesis (serve morning sickness) there were some days I was unable to even move out of bed, my mom had to help me a lot...I wouldn't say it was embarrassing...more that I was frustrated with myself because I felt like a burden to her. 24 (nearly 25!) years old and my mom is taking care of me because I am physically struggling to.
She does food for me most of the time and has been helping me sort everything I need to for my new arrival due in November! From buying the stuff I need, to being at the constant appointments and sorting out my space (because I live with her) to make the room I need. To this day I still feel like a burden, I think how am I suppose to look after this child, if I cant look after myself properly?
She tells me constantly that i'm not and she wants to be there for me but still, those thoughts are in my head. I am beyond grateful for her and my family's support, they have been amazing but its hard admitting that you need help in any situation.
Asking for help is tough but its nothing to feel bad for. We are not super humans and we can't do everything! We are stubborn people who don't like to admit that we can't do it because it may make up think less of ourselves. But its okay to admit you need help! We are supposed to be there for each other no matter what, because that what family, friends and good people do.
Why I ask for help...
As much as I still feel like a pain or burden, I know I have to ask for the help, not just because im physically struggling, but I have to think about my unborn child...I cannot risk doing things by myself they may put them them ask risk! Also there is so much I have to think about and do and having the help there is reassuring that I will have the support I need, as much as I am stubborn.
If I'm out in town or in the supermarket and I see someone struggling I offer to help or just help them. Not just because if you do good you get good in return, but it makes you feel good knowing you've helped someone and made life easier for them or brightened there day knowing there is still good in the world.
Why you should ask for help
I could write a list of reasons why here...but the answer is simple, Its okay that you need help and you should ask so 1) You physically don't cause any harm to yourself or anyone around you 2) So you don't burn yourself out mentally.
You could be a new mom...a mom with 3 kids or someone who is struggling to get something in the supermarket, don't be afraid to ask for help. In times of need Help is at hand.
Yes it's hard to ask someone for help in times of need when you don't want to, but don't struggle by yourself. You aren't being annoying and You aren't being needy.
You maybe stuck in a difficult situation and not know how to fix things or turn the situation around. Those closet to you or friends maybe able to offer some simple advice that could change everything or come up with something you had no previously considered.
When you don't ask for help its like being counter productive...your prolonging the struggle and the situation by trying to 'bite off more than you can chew' as they say.
Remember to you are important too, don't burn yourself out or hurt yourself trying to take on too much.